The good? Four packs for eight bucks. The bad? Filters whose job it seems is to facilitate cancer. The ugly? Looking totally desperate for nicotine. Once, when I was in a hard place and smoking Pilots, He Who Looks Good in Jeans bought me a pack of Parliaments just so he didn’t have to watch me suffer.Rating: 45%
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18 comments:
Andrew! They have good deals on Parliaments if you look around a little.... don't do Dallas!
Did Glenn smoke half the pack he bought for you?
Probably. If people r drinkin', people r smokin' (my cigs. But every smoker will confess: we love to see other people say, "I quit smoking years ago, but, well, can I...?").
Parmilents, guys. They're called Parmilents.
Is that Cape Bretonese?
I met a guy from Kentucky and that's what he called them. He was wearing seersucker shorts, so I assume he knew what he was talking about.
We don't have Parliaments in Canada. Or real Marlboros, although Imperial Tobacco makes a brand called Marlboro under license. The Canadian FDA are straight outta Nazi Germany. Our diet pop tastes like shit, too.
QUESTION: Do they even make Lucky Strikes anymore? I used to love those things when I lived in Europe, but I couldn't find them in Maine, and I can't find them in Texas.
When I was out on the town Sat night these nice people came up to our table and gave me a free Zippo and two "buy one, get one" coupons for Camels. I quit smoking over a year ago, so I might be willing to trade these coupons for a trip to the ass cabin. Or I might be willing to put them in an envelope and mail em on down to you for nothing. Whatever, your call.
(Just kidding about the ass cabin. I just want to say ass cabin one more time.)
I'm pretty sure they still make Lucky Strikes. I think I saw them within the last couple of years in a cigarette machine in Alton, IL. I only noticed because I think my dad smoked them in his youth. (non-filtered... yuck!) I know I don't see them around often, though I haven't been a smoker for a LONG time.
I thought Nazi Germany had some good smokes, as far as smokes go.
Hehe... Seersucker. According to George Carlin, "seersucker" is defined as "one who blows clairvoyants".
John, when in Canada I used to love to smoke DuMauriers. I think I have an old crumpled pack in one of my drawers at my parents' house (too scared to throw it out?). It's not the one with the limp cigarette-penis warning, though... it's the one with the kid that looks like Elian Gonzales.
I smoked DuMaurier Extra Lights for a long time. The best warning was the mouth with rotten teeth and cancer that was the same size as an actual mouth so you could cover your real mouth with a cigarette pack and look like your teeth were all fucked up.
When my cousin would buy cigs she would request, "Not the brain or the heart, please."
@Laurie,
The ass cabin is all yours. Did you get the Zippo?
@John,
Yes, they still make Lucky Strikes. That was another brand I smoked in grad school that month I blew all my money and was buying cigs with pocket change. Also, oddly, they still make Chesterfield Kings--which are unfiltered, burn like hell, and killed F. Scott Fitzgerald.
Yep, I did get a Zippo. I think the people who gave it to me were promo people for Camel. Or possibly Zippo. Not sure which. Either way, free stuff!
I had a zippo with Moby Dick on it. Don't know WTF happened to it.
Like Ahab, I've thrown my pipe overboard anyway. It's really going to hell now.
I can't believe you just made a Mody Dick joke. Oh wait, yes I can. Fucking dork.
It makes Rainbow Pony sad when you swear and say mean things, Laurie.
Bite me.
I gotta try those Dallas brand cigarettes.
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