My Crazy Neighbor

I first became aware of my crazy upstairs neighbor on Thanksgiving two years ago, shortly after I moved into my then new apartment. I was sitting at my kitchen table watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and diligently preparing for my upcoming exams (sadly true, but I did go to a friend's for dinner later that night) when I heard an incredibly whiny voice screaming down the airshaft in the middle of our building and into my apartment. She was yelling at her mom, something to the effect of "BUT I AM AN ADULT MOM! F-BOMB F-BOMB I'M 24 YEARS OLD AND I PAY ALMOST ALL OF MY OWN BILLS!!!!" I resisted the temptation to yell back that she certainly wasn't acting like an adult and btw don't talk to your mom like that, you crazy bitch!

Lately my crazy neighbor has been having some relationship strife with her ex-boyfriend. How do I know he is her EX boyfriend? Because she keeps going out into the hallway of our building to yell insane things at him on the phone (bitch is CRAZY if she thinks her roommate can't hear her). A couple of weeks ago she spent a full hour yelling at him for going skiing on a weekend she couldn't go. He was, apparently, going to go there and fuck some slut (because that is WHAT PEOPLE DO THERE) and should not go but instead tell his friends he wants to go on a nice date with his ex-girlfriend and then ski with her sometime in the future.

About a week later she came home at three in the morning on a weeknight and proceeded to ring the buzzer of every single person in the building for 20 minutes (ok, maybe I was home, and awake, but I didn't know it was her...it could have been a crazy person, the speaker part of my buzzer has never worked..I live above a bar! a drunk person could have passed out on the buzzer!). This went on until my landlord texted me and asked if I was home so then I buzzed her in. I peeked out the peephole and saw her stumbling up the stairs with some dude carrying a six pack in tow. What a hot mess!

Today she is screaming at the ex again. No idea what about because I'm watching Throwdown with Bobby Flay (Bobby Flay!) and don't care enough to eavesdrop. SIGH.

Rating: 30% (it's annoying, but sort of entertaining too)

PS -- Sorry for the long reviews today, Glenn. I know you hate that.

My flight to Houston - First Leg

The first leg of my flight to Houston (LGA to DWF) was pretty okay. My ipod played lots of Bon Iver, Eddie Vedder, and Radiohead (the Holy Trinity, Vedder is Jesus), and I read this month's issue of O Magazine (a guilty pleasure). The woman next to me did not bother me and there were no crying babies (successful flight musts). And I flew over some mountains (picture at left) or something. But it was a really long flight, points off for that. Also points off for American Airlines not being JetBlue (where are my damn blue potato chips, AA?!).

Rating: 67%

new york city apartment brokers

There really is nothing worse in the whole world. Each one is full of concentrated evil. Seriously.

Rating: Am I allowed to give lower than 0%?

Photo: I found that photo at this website, http://carmenrealestate.com, and I swear that is the second photo that popped up when I typed in "broker" for a google image search, and boy doesn't he fit the description?