Every once in a while I get an e-mail that has a subject line such as, "Her grudge against Paula had been revived, and her very tones betrayed that it grew stronger with every word she spoke which had any reference to the girl", and I have to open the e-mail because I'm dumb enough to risk whatever the consequences out of curiosity (and I enjoy a good story). I particularly enjoy the end of said story. The following is the body of that very e-mail:Perhaps it was chiefly with a diplomatic design to linger and ingratiate himself that Deronda patted the boys head, saying "What is your name, sir?"
"Jacob Alexander Cohen", said the small man, with much ease and distinctness.
"You are not named after your father, then."
"No, after my grandfather, he sells knives and razors and scissors my grandfather does", said Jacob, wishing to impress the stranger with that high connection. He gave me this knife.
Oh, well it's not as funny as the first time I read it.
RATING: 29%
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7 comments:
Why don't you review your new keychain?
I might. I might. But there's no way in hell I'm actually going to carry that around. I don't need a bottle opener on me, that's why the good Lord gave me teeth.
I don't understand what this email was trying to sell you. Let me tell you about some weirdo ad call I got on my answering machine. It was this woman from Hollywood Video, and she was telling me about new releases when another voice broke in to tell her about phone charges she had. Then she said something like "What, I paid those!" and the fake interrupter left. The first woman then said "What a cheap shot! Let me tell you about some cheap shots we have at Hollywood video right now!"
Jesus Christ, was all of that really necessary to get me to rent a tape?
Wow. I think what's strangest about this e-mail is that I don't know if it qualifies as spam. They weren't soliciting anything except for possibly a really terrible book or the next million dollar major motion picture (those seem about equal these days).
I'm tempted to start writing a short story, and sending it out piece-by-piece in email form, to like thirty or forty different emails at a time. It's like viral marketing, only dumber.
Hmmm I wonder why I never got the Spam email? I usually read them b/c they are pretty funny at times. Oh and please refer to me as Princess from now on...especially at work! :)
It wasn't sent to anyone at work. I rarely get spam at work except for that string of e-mails from that Hollywood PR guy.
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