Mr. Show

Mr. Show was a sketch comedy show that ran for four years in the 90s on HBO, so they could say things like "fuck," "shit," and "counterculture." It starred comedians David Cross and Bob Odenkirk, and had a lot of pre-fame appearances by Jack Black and Sarah Silverman if you like those whackos. Also the voice of Spongebob was a regular cast member. The sketches are mostly hilarious with only a few duds, and one of my favorite aspects of the show was that every sketch ran into each other like in the old Monty Python show. So go Netflix it or buy it why don't ya, or check these out first.

RATING: 83%

Iron Man

Well I have to say that this was probably one of the top four comic book movies of all time, next to X-Men 2 (I refuse to say X2), Spider-man 2, and Superman. People who maybe aren't quite as large a geek as me were always like "Oh man, I can't believe they cast Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark, this movie will blow," but many of us knew this was genius. In the comics, Tony Stark is a womanizing alcoholic douchebag, so the casting was perfect. Anyway, this was great in addition to Robert Downey Jr. because it had so much respect for the source material, and it actually seems like Marvel is working to create a movie universe filled with their heroes. And there was a lot of stuff getting blown up real good which didn't hurt.

RATING: 83%

Doom Patrol: Musclebound

The problem with Grant Morrison as a writer is that although he is great, he usually only goes about 10 issues on a book tops before everything stops making sense. New X-Men is the longest run he's ever done and stayed coherent, but by the last three storylines (Fantomex, Xorn/Magneto, weird future I don't even know what???) the book was far out there. His current run on Batman didn't even go three issues before it stopped making sense. Anyway, he's a great writer, and I pretty much pick up anything he writes without thinking about it, but I think in all of history the best book ever for Grant Morrison was Doom Patrol. Doom Patrol is a group of weird outcast superheroes, and when Grant Morrison picked up the book in the late 80s he made them even weirder, including Robotman (just a dude's brain in a robot body, but he was always there), an ape face little girl with powerful imaginary friends, Crazy Jane, a woman whose multiple personalities each have a different power, and Danny The Street, a living street who could take them anywhere. From issue one of his run it was just totally bizarre, and this trade is no different. The thing is that the bizarreness was always expected, and is part of the allure of the book even, which makes Morrison's writing perfect. In this collection there are two main stories - the first involves a secret government plot to rid the world of imagination which is thwarted when guest star Flex Mentallo turns the pentagon into a circle, and the second story has the evil (?) Brotherhood Of Dada stealing Albert Hoffman's bicycle which has the power to send everybody on an acid trip, which the Doom Patrol must stop. Well, this review stopped making sense I think and also is way long, which probably gives you a good idea of Grant Morrison as a writer, so check it out if you like to be totally freaked.

RATING: 76%

Othello Suite by Elliot Goldenthal

You guys probably know Elliot Goldenthal for his composing of the hit scores to such movies as Titus, Frida, Interview With The Vampire, and Batman And Robin. I've always liked Elliot Goldenthal's film music, because it's loud and raucous and he uses a lot of brass, but the problem is that every movie score he does sounds pretty much the same. Well, a lot of composers are like that (cough James Horner cough), but then I was in the store one day in my youth and saw this ballet that he had composed and decided to pick it up for shits and pretentiousness. While it is definitely Elliot Goldenthal, it is everything good about his film scores without the confines and brevity of film tracks. It's epic in scope, but still maintains the loud circus quality of his work that I love so much, so hooray for this.

RATING: 79%

Defending A Thesis

If you go to an MFA like I did, then you probably will have to defend your thesis in front of some professors. It's pretty easy once you get in the room, but beforehand it's nervewracking because if one thing goes wrong in scheduling you can't graduate. Luckily, I had to write a 10 page explanation of my thesis (a collection of poems) before I defended, and while I hated doing it while I was doing it, when I got into the defense it paid off because I already had to ask myself a lot of questions about my work. Basically, I gave a little talk about what I was doing, my professors asked questions, and then they spent the majority of the time arguing with each other, which took the burden off of me. So defending is fun I guess and you should try it if you have the time.

RATING: 64%

Harold And Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay

When I told a friend the other day that I was going to see this movie he asked me to let him know how it was. I said I could probably sum it up without seeing it, and that it had some funny parts, a lot of slow parts, and thought it was a lot more socially conscious than it actually was. Well, bingo. If you like pot humor and nudity, then you should see this movie I guess, and it's also a step in the right direction that even though these two characters are still pretty stereotyped (the Asian guy, Harold, is a neat freak who works in business, and the Indian guy, Kumar, was in med school and had demanding parents), at least they are the main characters and plus they smoke a lot of weed which isn't a stereotype for them. So check it out if you like to smoke pot or laugh.

RATING: 53%

Stankonia by Outkast

Though (or maybe because) it defies all genre classification, Stankonia by Outkast is a great album, but I bet all you guys know that already. I mean, it's got great songs like Ms. Jackson, Gasoline Dreams, and my favorite track B.O.B. Anyway, it's a great fusion of hip-hop, rock, electronic, folk, polka, raga, sea-shanty, and country and/or western. Well, I made most of that up but you guys probably already own this already and if you don't then what are you waiting for, a personalized invitation?

RATING: 87%

Radiohead make your own remix

Find it here. So what Radiohead is doing here is giving folks the individual pieces (musically speaking) of their In Rainbows tune "Nude" and letting them make their own remixes. That. Is. Awesome. I don't even know how to remix stuff but I swear I am going to play with this in Garageband as soon as my stupid finals are over. What I can't figure out is why I keep thinking Radiohead just can't get any better because dammit, they just keep proving me wrong.

Rating: 90%

The Dodos: Visiter

Tho I liked this album from the start,* I wasn't crazy about The Dodos' percussion and vocals combo because I felt like the percussion elements overpowered the vocals and that was kind of annoying. But then after a bunch of listens I realized that what they've actually done is put the two elements on the same level rather than having the lyrics overpower everything else like on most albums. Now I just love it. Well worth checking out.

More songs here, including the one that hooked me.

Rating: 79%

*It had me when the banjo entered on "Walking."

Master of Fine Arts Degree

This is an ok degree which I have now, except it's a real gyp that I can't add anything to what people call me. Like if I got an MD whenever telemarketers asked for Mr. Shay-heen I could angrily say that's DR. SHAH-heen, thank you, and I'll take eight life insurance policies please. Also, they always say that you can get a job teaching college with an MFA but that is a total lie. You need like three award winning books before that happens. In conclusion if anybody needs to know anything about poetry feel free to ask me, because for some reason the University of Houston thinks I am a master at it.

RATING: 67%

The World Is Not Enough

This is the third Bond movie Pierce Brosnan made, and in my opinion the best, although in everybody else's opinion it is the worst. I guess there are a couple problems. One, it is trying to be a bit darker, kind of like why people liked Casino Royale (but didn't like the Timothy Dalton ones?), but Bond says these horrible corny puns like every other line, and Two, Denise Richards is fucking terrible in it, and I mean the worst. I know the movie is ridiculous with the flying helicopters with buzz saws on them, but because Pierce Brosnan is acting well it works, but every time she opens her mouth (and she's a nuclear physicist, by the by), I just remember how stupid the whole fiasco is. Oh well, at least it has some great action scenes which is all you need from these movies in the end.

RATING: 72%

(Also, sorry for not posting last week, but I had to defend my thesis so I was a little busy. But now I'm done so everybody can call me Master Glenn now.)

All Good Things...

This is the series finale of Star Trek: The Next Generation, so don't worry about me reviewing any more episodes of this show. This is one of the best finales ever made, and one of the best TNG episodes. The plot is tough to explain, but basically Picard is shifting through time thanks to Q and must save mankind from being wiped from existence. Anyway, it's a typical Star Trek plot, but what is great is the way that the whole thing ties back to the first episode of TNG, Encounter At Farpoint, when Q told Picard humanity was on trial, and also every character gets their own great moment. Maybe that's why the TNG movies sucked - they were basically the Picard and Data show, and we had already had excellent closure with this episode.

RATING: 93%

Odelay by Beck

I think that after Loser hit everybody thought Beck was going to be a one hit wonder kind of person, but then when this great album came out people had to collectively eat crow or something. While Mellow Gold was acoustic and folksy, with only a little bit of sampling going on, Odelay was produced by the Dust Brothers, of Paul's Boutique fame. So this album is a lot more electronic, sampley, and dancey. It loses steam for me after track 8 or so, but having eight solid tracks in a row ain't no slouch. Click on these links!

(Also, I used to think it was a bale of hay jumping over that hurdle, but apparently it's a weird dog or something)

RATING: 85%

Life Cereal

I have no idea why Life cereal is called Life. Is it because it is so good that we must devote our entire lives to eating it? Well, I think it's a pretty decent cereal, but it's not that great, so calling your cereal "Life" is pretty pretentious, Quaker. This is a good cereal of sweet squares of some kind of grain, but one thing that I don't like is that every box of Life has to have some fucking kid on the cover, like if I was a parent who didn't know what kind of cereal to buy for my kids I would just pick up this one since there's a kid on the cover. Does that mean Honey Nut Cheerios are for bees, you stupid parent?

RATING: 70%

Coffee Mugs

Coffee mugs are a good sort of container for any drinks. Most regular glasses do not have a handle like coffee mugs, so forget about drinking something hot out of them unless you want to be injured which I don't. But also, I think the handle is a nice kind of thing to have all the time for a glass. Makes it feel kind of elegant or something. Also, their small size is a perfect proportion for a drink of anything except beer.

RATING: 72%

Ultimate X-Men/Fantastic Four

This is just a two issue thing that was included in some trade with some other useless stories. The plot is this crazy girl (Ultimate Mad Thinker) is trying to get revenge at Reed Richards because she used to like him so she steals Cerebro from the X-Men. Mike Carey is kind of difficult to follow sometimes, because it often feels as though he is rushing through his stories and leaves things out, and Pasqual Ferry's art is my least favorite art in the universe. So this book's not that great, but if you want to pick it up here's a link.

RATING: 37%

Enter The Wu-Tang (36 Chambers) by Wu-Tang Clan

CREAM
Protect Ya Neck
METHOD Man
Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuthing Ta F' Wit

RATING: 94%

Rogue Galaxy

I have not played a true role-playing video game since Final Fantasy Legend for the Game Boy in 1991. So I looked at reviews of this game that praised it for having a Star Wars like story and over 120 hours of gameplay. Well, I guess it's in space, and I believe the over 120 hours of gameplay because every thirty seconds monsters jump out of nowhere and you have to fight them. It's the exact same every time, too. So this game is boring and too bad I paid a lot of money for it because role playing games never drop in price much for used copies.

RATING: 40%

Preemptive Strike

I always liked Ro Laren because a) she was hot, and b) she wasn't a goody two shoes like everybody else on the goddamned Enterprise. Anyway, she's a tertiary character at best, and she was always in trouble. In this episode she is asked to infiltrate the Maquis, a terrorist organization against the Cardassians made up largely of Bajorans like Ro herself. Of course, she decides to join up with them at the end and it looks like Picard is going to cry because everybody on TNG is a big fat baby. This episode is pretty good though.

RATING: 70%

Death By Unga Bunga by The Mummies

This CD has the sound quality of something recorded on a peanut butter sandwich found in a dumpster, but I gotta say it's pretty fucking awesome. The Mummies were a crazy band that dressed up like mummies and never really paid any kind of money to be recorded. The songs are simple, but they're a whole lot of fun and they remind me of something you might have heard recorded in a garage in the 60s, except it was recorded in a garage in the 80s and 90s by people wrapped in bandages.

(You Must Fight To Live On The Planet Of The Apes)

(Also, there's nudity in that link to their homepage for those of you at work)

RATING: 71%

Street Angel

As you guys have probably figure out, the comics I mainly collect are mainstream superhero books. Not that I don't like the others, it's just that often whenever I pick an independent book like Street Angel, it gets canceled after like five issues and I get depressed. Street Angel was a quirky little ball of fun about a homeless skateboarding 12 year old vigilante who fights everybody from ninjas to Cortez to Satan. It got canceled after five issues and I was depressed (well, it didn't get CANCELED, the creators just stopped making it), but if you can track the trade down I recommend picking it up if you like comedy and violence which I do.

RATING: 74%

Emergence

I liked this episode. In my old blog, I reviewed some TOS seasons, and explained that I liked that there could be a gangster world or a cowboy world or a Nazi world. In this episode, there is a gangster and a cowboy, and it's kind of a fun weird episode. Basically, the Enterprise computer starts being a lifeform, and wants to create offspring, but it's consciousness is located in the holodeck in the form of a train carrying a bunch of weirdos. It's stupid fun, but still fun.

RATING: 64%

My Computer

My computer isn't as terrible as it looks from this picture, although by the size of it I bet its monitor is about 95 years old. It has a good processor (2.4 gHz), and decent storage space (80 gigs), but its ram is pretty bad (256 MB). I tried to run Google Earth earlier and the map would barely move. To be fair, it's probably all the spy/malware that's buried in the computer from when it was my brother's, but it's still kind of sucky. Also, if I told my high school self that I was complaining about only having 256 megs of ram, he would shit himself, because he only had a computer with 4 megs of ram and 100 megs of harddrive space he was doublespacing up to 200 just so he could play X-Wing and Doom 2. Man, that kid needed to get laid.

RATING: 39%

Bloodlines

Don't worry; I only have three more episodes of TNG to review and then I'm done. I started watching these on Netflix on and off two years ago, and finally I have gotten to the end. Don't get me wrong - it's been fun, but the 7th season really sucks and I'll be glad to get to the fantastic series finale. Man, this show had one of the best. Oh, right - this episode has Picard finding out he has a son but just kidding he doesn't and it is tres boring.

RATING: 31%

Mighty Avengers: The Ultron Initiative

Here's an ethical dilemma: I did not read this entire trade's worth of stories, because when I was buying it in single issue format I hated it so much I dropped it. Now, if you know me and my comic buying habits, you know it takes a lot for me to drop a book - usually I will hold on to a book for at least 10 issues after I start hating it. But this one was awful. Here's the plot: after the Marvel Heroes' Civil War, professional douchebag Iron Man forms this group of government approved Avengers to avoid evil, and good thing to, because evil strikes in the first issue. The not so nice robot Ultron takes over Iron Man and then makes the weather really stormy, and for four issues the Avengers basically stare at the robot while standing on the same street corner, no exaggeration. Bendis, a famous comic writer despite being largely untalented, tries to incorporate thought balloons, but if this is all that's going on in these heroes' heads, then no wonder I dropped the book. (PS - I readded the book a couple issues later when an artist I love took over, Mark Bagley).

RATING: 21%

Firstborn

My friend Nick really likes the seventh season of Star Trek: The Next Generation, but I'm just going to have to go on record here saying that it's even worse than the first season. This episode deals with Worf's son Alexander, and how he doesn't want to become a Klingon warrior (he was raised by his progressive Klingon mother for three years). Anyway, I have to give spoilers here, but Alexander from the future comes and tries to convince him to do it, but it never explains how he got there, or where he went at the end. Also, In this season they spent a lot more episodes just on the ship, so they didn't have to make planet sets. Here, there is one set, but it is really simple and then they reuse it all episode long so lame.

RATING: 25%

I'll Be Lightening by Liam Finn

When a dude that I was making out with the other week put on Liam Finn's debut album I'll Be Lightening, I took pause. Was he putting on an album with lyrics like "girl you seemed so nice, but I'll be gone by morning time," and "well I honestly don't remember who you are" to send me a message or was this just what he'd been listening to lately? Because most people don't overanalyze every little thing in life, I assume it's likely the latter, but in the end that's neither here nor there. What is here and there is that despite its heavy and confusing lyrics, this album (that I had previously ignored because I was busy listening to Bon Iver) is actually pretty great. Loose heavy bass lines and thick lyrics make for a good time that I definitely recommend. Also, the internets tells me that Finn is the son of Neil Finn of Crowded House, which is neat because I have an odd attachment to "Don't Dream It's Over." Huzzah trivia. Huz-zah.

Rating: 72%

Call Of The West by Wall Of Voodoo

Wall Of Voodoo, for those of you who don't know, is this new wave band from the early eighties who were heavily influenced by spaghetti western music written by composers like Ennio Morricone. They had one "hit," "Mexican Radio," which is on this album, but I kind of like their other stuff too. Great tasting things don't always work together, like pickles and chocolate ice cream for example, but this marriage of western style and new wave really works. Though it's not on this album, you should also check out their cover of "Ring Of Fire," which ain't bad.

RATING: 64%

Generation M

This series spun out of the events of House of M, a lame kind of storyline in which the Scarlet Witch uttered the words "No More Mutants," reducing the Marvel comics mutant population to 200 people. It was poorly executed and way overhyped, but Generation M by Paul Jenkins and Ramon Bachs was a pretty decent result. It follows a news reporter, Sally Floyd, as she writes a column about recently depowered mutants. For some it is great because they can now be eligible for professional sports (in the Marvel Universe mutants are banned from pro sports), or they are no longer a lizard person, but for some it is bad because they used to have fire for a heart (Chamber), or they liked being able to fly. This is woven with the story of a serial killer who is murdering depowered mutants and harassing Sally Floyd, and her own dealing with the recent death of her daughter, who had a mutation that caused her to start getting younger until she died. It's a great character piece that I definitely recommend picking up even if you haven't read House of M, which was awful.

RATING: 76%

The Odd Couple by Gnarls Barkley

I don't know why so many people are down on this album, because I have to say it's pretty good. It's danceable, the music is complexly layered and varied in style, and the lyrics are intricately woven. I think it's a better album than Gnarls Barkley's first album. Anyway, I'll just link a couple songs and then you guys will probably definitely buy this one.

PS - only the first one is a legitimate video, so the second one will probably be down at any second.

RATING: 78%

Fantastic Four: Heroes Reborn

In the mid 90s, Marvel was on the verge of filing for bankruptcy, probably from producing too many foil cover variants that nobody ever bought. In order to try to boost sales, they created the company wide crossover of the Onslaught Saga, which ended with everybody except the X-Men and Spider-man dying. Then, they rebooted these characters in what was known as the "Heroes Reborn" storyline, which was supposed to solve thirty years of continuity gaffes, but instead was just boring and lame. This trade collects the first six issues of the Fantastic Four's Heroes Reborn story, which basically compresses the first 52 issues of old Fantastic Four continuity down. It's rushed and really boring, but Jim Lee drew it so that was a plus for anybody who likes Jim Lee's art, which in the 90s was everybody, and today is almost everybody I guess.

RATING: 38%