A Month of Boring Things - Day Thirty-One: The Dakota [Building]

In my younger and more vulnerable years, I lived in a private dorm that looked like a very very very very very very poor-man's Dakota building, and since I already had a weird fascination with one of its former residents, I felt pretty cool. Then I was lonely, and I didn't have the gutz to start a heroin addiction or marry a chinaman, and nobody ever shot me. So I created new heroes, and I grew up and had kidney stones. Okay, New York. I'll come live in you (deep deep inside of you), but you gotta pay my rent.




Rating: 66.666666666%

Bridges

You wanna know what I hate? It's whenever you're driving along on a nice road and then all of a sudden BAM you're falling to your death in a ravine. Well, one thing that can stop that from happening is to build like a sky road from one side of the ravine to the other, and that is called a bridge. Bridges can be pretty, and they can also be ugly, but as long as they aren't collapsing under you you'll probably be happy that they're there. The first bridge was designed in 1763 by George Washington during the French-Indian War, so chalk up another one in America's "win" column.

RATING: 83%

Buildings

Sometimes you can perhaps go in a building, which can be a good thing if it is way hot outside, and sometimes a cop or a pretend cop can say "Hey, don't go in here you're not authorized!" Most of us live in buildings, and some of us might live in a cool city with lots of tall buildings. Sometimes maybe a building burns or falls down, to which I say "Yo, building, shape up or ship out! Your job is to stay standing and hold people!" Mainly though tall buildings are cool to look at and admire even if everybody knows you're a tourist and says "Fuck you buddy, this is NewYork," but they say it in one of those movie accents.

RATING: 88%