The Creature From The Black Lagoon

This is another one of those Universal Monster movies everybody knows about but nobody has probably seen. It is about this gill-type man who lives underwater going about his own business until a bunch of busybody scientists harass him into kidnapping a bikini lady. It doesn't end up to well for one particular titular amphibian, let me tell you! The movie is pretty boring, with lots of long shots of biologists spouting that pseudo-science laced with heavy religion that seemed to be the only kind of science acceptable for 1950s era movies. On the bright side, the Creature's effects are still terrific, and the movie spawned this song and this scene.

RATING: 43%

Eddie Bauer Leather Belt

HOW TO MAKE AN GENUINE EDDIE BAUER LEATHER BELT:
1. Get a cow.
2. Feed it nothing but fish for several months.
3. Set it on fire.
4. Cut a 38" strip off the charred animal (40" if it's right after Christmas) and tie it around your waist.
5. Slump lower in your chair as the people around you wrinkle their noses.
6. Smile! You just saved $50!
7. Nod your head to the Eurotrash beat of Ace of Base.

RATING: 10% right now, but the belt is currently frozen in a sealed bag full of baking soda, and I have high hopes.

(Image from exc.images-amazon.com.)