Martyrs

Hey, do you like feeling good about yourself and life? If not, then this movie is for you. It is about the same thing every French horror movie post 2000 is about - horrible suffering and pain with no relief (although this one is actually about that, physically and philosophically). France is an interesting country because people from there will always talk about what awful savages Americans are but then they ban mosques from the whole country or make violent garbage like this where non-white girls get tortured to death. In conclusion France has the Louvre but remember that liking Western art is admitting complicity with imperialism you dumb duck!

RATING: TOOMUCHGRADSCHOOL%

(Alternate ending here)

Martyrs

Martyrs is a French horror film from 2008, directed by Pascal Laugier. Horror movie nerds will tell you that Martyrs is part of the recent wave of extreme horror movies coming out of France, films like Frontier(s) and Inside. Martyrs has a somewhat original premise but is marred by a second half that devolves into lengthy torture sequences marked by an almost complete absence of dialogue. Not recommended for the squeamish. Expect an American remake of Martyrs in 2010.

Rating: 55%

(Image from amazon.ca)