Star Trek: The Next Generation - "Samaritan Snare"

While Picard and Wesley go on a field trip together the Enterprise meets a ship of space dummies asking for help but if you'll recall the title of this episode it could be maybe a trap?

RATING: 63%

Mutton Chops

Easy way to say “stay away ladies” without opening your mouth. Plus they can cover up hideous facial scars while housing tiny parasitic creatures.


Note: Lemmy and Wolverine are exempt from any anit-mutton chop snarkery.
Rating: 8%

An Open Letter to the Banjo Guy

Listen, Banjo Guy, we both know you didn't bring that banjo to the bar to regale us with banjo songs, because you haven't played it once all night. I'd also bet a prize pig and three jugs of moonshine that you're not going to a banjo band practice later on, since it's one o'clock in the morning. Now I don't particularly hate bluegrass music, but I do particularly hate other straight males under 30 who think they're cute, and the temptation to wrest that hillbilly hipster fashion accessory from your little white stick arms and use it to give you the beating and/or strangling of a lifetime is hard to resist. On the upside, you'll probably look cooler with a neck brace than you do with a fucking banjo, and the little girls will be falling all over themselves to sign your multiple casts.

RATING: HEAVY METAL%

(Image from crabapplenyc.wordpress.com.)

The "No Call" Rejection

Some people think simply not calling a person is a perfectly acceptable way to say “not interested.” I am not one of these people. Specifically, I’m talking about a situation where you go on one or two dates with someone and then for whatever reason decide that you’re no longer interested in dating them. But instead of calling and politely saying, “hey I think you’re nice, but you’re just not right for me,” you simply don’t return their calls. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the motivation to go the no-call route—no doubt, it’s a lot easier on the party doing the rejecting. But it’s also rude as hell and completely immature. So here’s what I have to say to no-call rejectors: Any person that was willing to take time out of their schedule to go on one or more dates with you deserves the basic respect of a polite call saying you aren’t interested. Any other method just makes them feel bad and you look like an asshole.

Rating: immaturedickwad%