Short reviews of pretty much whatever. Finally, you can discover if Frosted Flakes Gold has more social worth than Illmatic or Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare.
Also known as just Dracula, Horror of Dracula is a movie about this foreign dude named Dracula who likes to drink people's blood. At the beginning of every Dracula movie I always want Jonathan Harker to end up being pals with Dracula, and then maybe they play some board games or go for a nice walk or something, but that's never how it works out. I hate to admit it, but I'm 30 and this is the first time I've ever seen a Hammer horror film. My bad, ok!
This miniseries is dedicated to Nightawk, the Supreme Power universe's analog of Batman, except he hates white people and also doesn't have the "no killing" clause. Also, I guess since Supreme Power was leaving Marvel's "Adult Label" to go PG-13, they decided to go out in... uh, style? In Batman comics, Joker might poison a bunch of people. and maybe we'll see some cleaned up corpses or whatever, but mainly it's gloves-on carnage. Here, an insane serial killer dressed up as a clown kills drug addicts, babies and kids with poison, who all vomit up blood, spasm, or shoot themselves in great detail. I don't really know if I can recommend it, but luckily I dodged the bullet since it was never collected in trade paperback and tracking down issues would probably be a real bitch unless you ask me to borrow them.
Cheap steaks bleeding all over the inside of your fridge? You need the Chuck Steak Maxi Pad. I was going to throw it away, but then I thought it might help with that just-woke-up puffiness.
A cut is when you accidentally or on purpose chop open yourself and you bleed and have pain. Some wackos/high school kids enjoy attent- I mean, cutting themselves, but me, I think that shits for the birds. Getting cut hurts, whether you do it on a switchblade or can of cat food. The worst part is when you bite open your lip or cheek, cutting your mouth, and then you want to eat some salsa or wings. No dice motherfucker!
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