Rise of the Planet of the Apes

When I say that Rise of the Planet of the Apes is one of the best genre films of the year so far, I'm not monkeying around. The quality of the visual effects and motion capture performances will make you go bananas. You'll forget all about that horrible Tim Burton Planet of the Apes film from ten years ago, like... like... like so much thrown feces. Seriously though, Rise of the Planet of the Apes is a pretty solid flick. What it lacks in Heston, it makes up for in Lithgow.

Rating: 77%

(Image from thefilminformant.com)

Planet of the Apes (2001)

I don't usually "nerd out", but damn this remake SUCKS! When I was a kid I watched both Planet of the Apes and Beneath the Planet of the Apes at least a million times. The original was extremely awesome! But Tim Burton came along and decided he would totally screw everything up. Instead of being an ironic and satirical story, it's only left as a straightforward story about escape. Now, I can't possibly go over everything that sucked about this film, but the stupidest thing is that every human in this flick can talk. What the hell?!

RATING: 11%