Yes, you have taut, coffee-coloured skin, the thick, straight, black hair of an Egyptian princess and you look great in a postage stamp-sized slutty Hallowe'en costume. But in 20 years you'll be covered in stretch marks and hairy moles like the rest of us, and no one will like you because you're mean to everybody. Perhaps I'm too judgmental and the real reason you're so rude is because you stayed up all last night reading Sense and Sensibility while caring for your ailing mother, but that still wouldn't explain your raging sense of entitlement.RATING: 17%, because people who deal with drunks earn their tips.
(Image from rlv.zcache.com.)
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4 comments:
I was half insulted by this, but then I remembered, "Oh yeah. I'm pretty friggin' hairy." Well played, John. Well played.
I'd be mean if I had to read Sense and Sensibility again, too.
Of course she's never read Sense and Sensibility. She had one of those stupid, incurious faces whose response to the whole world is "Like, ew." I only pray she doesn't get slapped around too bad after the inevitable limousine gangbang that will come to delineate her golden youth from her miserable adulthood.
BTB, Jane Austen is a superlative writer. I hated her books for more than a decade, and then realized that the lack was definitely in me.
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