Is your name A Woman Who Likes Men Who Look Like Women? If so, then Johnny Depp, former teen heartthrob, just might be for you. Nah, just playing, I think he's a fine actor full of charisma, unlike this movie which is boring and pretentious. The one cool thing is that Johnny Depp's character is named William Blake, like the poet, and he has this neat part where he walks up to a bad guy and says "I'm William Blake, do you know my poetry?" and then shoots him. But it's super boring apart from that. Also, Wikipedia goes to great lakes to praise the film for it's "extremely accurate portrayal of American Indians," but it's still the age-old stereotype of the Indian with mystic wisdom helping out the stupid white man. Well, check this movie out if you like being bored.RATING: 28%
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5 comments:
oh man how do we hide this review from sean?
i'm off to write a poem based on Mean Girls.
Maudite fucking chalice de tabernac d'hostie de putain merd. Dead Man is a great movie, you dingleberry. Neil Young's soundtrack is superb, it's got Robert fucking Mitchum talking to a goddamn Christing bear, Lars "Bishop" Henriksen cooking people and eating them, and cameos from all kinds of actors who are now sad old twats back when they were cool. You need to take some dexies or something and grow a fucking attention span.
And the "mystic wisdom" of the Indian is called fucking religion, and lots of people have it. Not to mention the fact that he's helping the white man kill white men. Gah!
Hey, look, I'll never recant a review from R3, but I will admit that when I saw this years ago I really liked it. As it stands, this was the third and final movie on a Western Movie Night we had last week, so it's a bad closer, and a bad movie to follow The Searchers and High Plains Drifter, which are much more entertaining on a base level.
(If you want to see me recant a review from R3 in a big way, check out the next issue of Gulf Coast: A Journal Of Literature And Fine Art, due out this November). Plug!
Don't equivocate, or give me excuses like a fucking mangina. R3 is NOTHING if we don't stand by our ignorant opinions 100%. A better response would be the following:
"Dad man is so stupid and so are you. If you don't like my review guess what asshole you can review it because your a member."
I wanted to like Dead Man, but I'm not sure if falling asleep twice during the movie is much of a testament to its greatness.
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