Saturday, January 24, 2009

Fable II

Fable II is generally regarded as a pretty awesome video game, and as someone who likes pretty awesome video games, I was happy to make it my first purchase for my new XBox 360. What I didn't know: Fable II is like a cross between Diablo and The Sims, and certainly not as awesome as many people make it out to be. There are also a couple of truly, almost game-breakingly annoying things for me: (1) it substitutes plot for story, which I find just about unforgivable in an RPG (2) no one in the game appears to talk to you or really look you (you meaning your stupid emotionless avatar) in the face. If this happened in real life...oh wait it does happen in real life, but that's not the point.

Frankly, if I wanted to become a real estate maganate, slaughter innocent townspeople, and have bad aim during surprise encounters with curious beasts - well, I'd send away for one of those infomercial info-kits and start getting involved in adjustable rate mortgages. In Texas.

RATING: 45% (which means that its better than the jump-in-the-air-profile-photo, but MUCH worse than Fallout 3, which there's no review for, but trust me on this)

(P.S. - The gambling minigames are truly awesome, and I only wish a casino would be smart enough to institute a couple of them as a one-off deal. I'm looking at you, Snoqualmie!)

6 comments:

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

yea fallout 3 rulz but you can't kill kids which is kind of teh suck

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

hey how com i cant make coments in the drunken negro head cookies reivew any more maybe brent newland was right

Anonymous said...

Question: Brent Newland, how do you keep those glass shower doors scum-free?

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

dear the internet:

first i oil it down with my hair and then i wipe it with my black construction company shirt

sincerely,
yours

John said...

"Do you think these girls like me? NO, they like my money!"

LipstickMom123 said...

Fable 2 sounds FABULOUS! HA!