Usually when a chip company comes up with a new flavor, they try to name it after some of its ingredients. This leads me to believe that Doritos' new flavor is made from the distilled screams of its factory workers. I can only assume that one night some unfortunate employee fell into the machine that cuts the chips into those pleasing triangular shapes. After the accident, workers on the back shift began to complain about hearing the disembodied cries of their fallen co-worker. And so it was that after much deliberation, management decided to turn the grisly incident into a profitable new revenue stream.Rating: Even better than Jalapeno & Cheddar %
(Image from www.nooschi.com)
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15 comments:
yo glen r u exited about the disney/marvel megateamup its gonna be like a crossover between x-men and justice league
Doctor Doom is going to fuck Donald Duck's shit up!
Also, are these chips cream cheese flavored? Because that's gross.
They're not actually cream cheese flavored. I can't really put a distinction on the flavor, other than that they're spicy. Sort of like an amalgamation of all the various spicy Doritos flavors.
Full disclosure: I've been a smoker for almost 15 years now. These days, things have to be extremely spicy or salty to really register with me.
I can't even eat Doritos anymore--the orange shit on my fingers drives me crazy, plus the salt makes my fingers swell up.
Ever read Stephen King's short story, "The Mangler"? It's fucking sweet.
Night Shift was probably the first Stephen King short story collection I ever read, but that was more than ten years ago now. I don't remember anything about it other than that it was about a killer laundry press or something. I know Tobe Hooper made a movie out of it in the mid 90s, I haven't seen it but I'm sure it sucks balls.
Yeah, with Robert Englund? It's awful. The part where the machine comes to life is all rendered in laughably terrible 1990s era CG.
So what you're telling me is that some asshat at the Doritos factory was like, hell I'm out of ideas, let's just see what happens when we throw all the seasonings in one pot. And this was the result. Sounds delicious.
It's hard for me describe what Scream Cheese actually tastes like, there's simply no "natural flavor" comparison. Instead of the company combining the flavors in some sort of controlled manor, my guess is they just swept up all the left over flavor dust from the factory floor.
heh, controlled manor
Heaven forbid it would be done in an uncontrolled manor. Such a house of ill repute is no place for chip flavor business.
IJ, I heart you for mentioning "The Mangler," because this post made me think of it too.
I think I'll stick with my childhood favorite, Cool Ranch.
"A demon called up in conjunction with the hand of glory could eat a stack of Bibles for breakfast."
Haha, I just noticed the french words on the bag. Silly Canada.
There are Quebecois in Canada who would throw a shit fit over that comment. It's a good thing I'm not friends with any of them, or we might have to delete it.
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