Vampires

Vampires suck. They aren't really anything except zombies with table manners. Sometimes a vampire might fall in love with you but don't fall for it, he either just wants to be let in so he can suck your blood or he thinks you're some broad who's been dead for centuries. For some reason if you google "vampires" you get a lot of pictures of people with big boobs and pale makeup, which is a piece of vampire mythos I am unfamiliar with. Maybe Joss Whedon had something to do with that, who knows. Lots of people think vampires are soooo romantic, omg, and you might date somebody like that in high school but don't worry, there aren't any real vampires in Lake City, Florida. In conclusion I would like to use my vampires suck joke again that I made up, and also reiterate that vampires are the least scary of all monsters and also easiest to kill (cross, stake through heart, garlic, sunlight, silver bullet in coffin, beheading, sadness).

RATING: 41%