Thursday, October 16, 2008

Red States

You know what's scarier than a vampire, a Frankenstein, and a werewolf all put together? States where the majority of people vote for Republican presidential candidates! As I shine my fancy voting shoes and prepare for November 4th, I am haunted by the knowledge that whether I vote, don't vote, stand outside the polls bedecked for Obama, or spend the day in an alcoholic haze, nothing I do will change the fact that Texas' 32 electoral votes will go to Senator John McCain. The knowledge that I am surrounded by millions of people who hate poors and immigrants and women is frightening... see? New Mexico looks scared shitless! Spooky Scary! Nevertheless, I will still dress up like a voter on Halloween, in my nice shoes, 4 days early, and wait patiently in line for my chance to not matter.

RATING: 11%

10 comments:

Chris said...

Well, it's not better than being in New York, where Obama will win no matter what.

But at least Houston will vote Democrat. That makes me feel better.

laurie said...

At least in NY we get the pleasure of fighting the Republicans for the state senate. Goodbye Joe Bruno! I will not miss you!

John said...

I hope they both lose.

LoCo said...

Sorry Chris. I don't think your NY pot shots apply here. It's nice to walk through streets full of people who aren't deluded. (which is why Houston is OK too.)

Chris said...

Hey, no shots to New York. I love New York (sans the Yankees).

I'm just saying that technically 99.999999% of the population's vote will never "count" either way. Mathematically you've got an exponentially greater shot of winning the lottery than being the deciding vote in an election. I'm not trying to say voting is not important, but I don't vote out of the idea it ever "counts". Perhaps I'm just a hopeless romantic.

And quite honestly while many people in Texas (for example) are quite deluded, I've found many of them much more in touch with reality when it comes to an issue like immigration (by that I mean they have a better grasp of the situation) than, say, someone in Vermont.

My only point being I've seen raging bigots all over America. While the South is certainly no source of pride when it comes to acceptance, one day I hope to forgive them for their ignorance when they come around (if they do).

Viking Andrew said...

Yay New Mexico! Like old Mexico, only shinier!

Viking Andrew said...

...but why is NM saying, "Halp!" ?

Chris said...

I like New Mexico. I think I'm voting New Mexico in the election. They've got great food.

Sarah said...

I love Massachusetts!

LoCo said...

New Mexico needs Halp because it is trapped amongst the red states. I think we should invite New Mexico to partake in the coastal East or West party. New Mexico would have fun there. Don't even get me started on Indiana. Get with the program, Indy!