Thursday, December 3, 2009

A Month of Ill-Fated Consumer Products #4: The Smokeless Cigarette

Back in the 80's, medical science confirmed what everyone who wasn't a complete moron should've known all along: secondhand smoke is bad. Around that time, Camel introduced Premier Lights, which worked by "heating and aeresolizing" the tobacco rather than burning it, and purported to reduce "biological activity." I've never tried one personally, but I'd bet a Canadian twenty that Premier Lights did indeed reduce "biological activity," since a smokeless cigarette sounds about as stimulating as a fuckless porno movie.

RATING: Gimme%

(Image from tobaccoproducts.org.)

5 comments:

IR said...

Whether it smokes or not, you just need something to put in your mouth.

I.J. said...

Ain't that the truth.

Unknown said...

to be fait those James Gunn PG Pornos were pretty great.

do your research.

Internet John said...

James Gunn pornos were PG-13 check the facts b4 u post lies.

Timmaaay!!! said...

According to the excellent film Barbarians at the Gate (see it) about the RJR Nabisco buyout, the smokeless cigarette "tastes like shit and smells like a fart".