Friday, June 19, 2009

A Month of Boring Things - Day Three: The Ryugyong Hotel

So in the eighties the North Koreans* got their collective panties in a wad over some hotel the South Koreans had built. In response, they began construction on the Ryugyong Hotel. Then they ran out of money. The place has been untouched since 1992.** But they won't take the crane off the top--you know, just in case. Well, I have this to say to you, Ryugyong Hotel: Shit or get off the pot, buddy. Because there are scores of us who would like the pot, who need the pot. We, too, feel the desire to shit and, preferably, we would like to do so in the pot. And you, by neither shitting in nor getting off the pot, are making it difficult for us to do our own shitting. And that is leading to moderate-to-severe bowel pain. And that is out and out rude. And also boring.

Rating: 12%



*This dude from Canada has an interesting blog about N.K.

**Apparently the North Koreans have recently decided to add windows to the bastard. Windows! To a half-finished structure!

31 comments:

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

glen got severe bowal pain from the cheese stuff hes been eating (dude hasnt pood since he wrote the review and cant go to hospital w/o health in surance

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

hey viking andrew

Viking Andrew said...

Yes, R Kelley tag?

Chris said...

Hooray for the triumphs of communism!

Belabras said...

That whole 'having a bat shit insane dictator' thing must have delayed construction.

Viking Andrew said...

At one point, construction costs were the equivalent of 2% of the country's GDP.

shoppista said...

Man, I love North Korea. I mean, I feel really sorry for its citizens, but their nutjob dictator really is entertaining. It's like a country controlled by an angry three-year-old.

Chris said...

Anyway, supposedly they've been doing some work on the building. Something about building a telecom infrastructure or some shit, since no one has cellies except for employees of the state.

Apparently, one website claims it'd take $2 billion to "finish the hotel and make it safe, that is the same as 10% of the annual GDP of North Korea."

Damn.

Chris said...

And by "Anyway" I was referring to my previous comment, which was just trying to stir some shit.

Viking Andrew said...

I don't think your previous comment will be stirring any shit. Nobody here on R3 is a communist.

Viking Andrew said...

Except maybe R Kelley tag...I'm not sure where he stands.

Chris said...

V.A. are you kidding? I'm pretty sure Glenn reps the DPRK.

Socialism. Communism. What's the difference?

Viking Andrew said...

What's the difference between Denmark and China?

I'll tell you: Blond hair.

laurie said...

Why would they need a big hotel when no one is allowed to visit there anyway? Silly non-Americans.

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

i was gonna say i got a joke for you wanna hear it

Viking Andrew said...

@RKt,

Yeah, I wanna hear it.

laurie said...

Damn guys, get a room.

I.J. said...

Speaking of blonde hair, that Canadian blogger is truly a handsome man.

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

alright:

knock knock

Viking Andrew said...

@I.J.,

He certainly is.


@RKt,

Who's there?

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

smellmop

Viking Andrew said...

smellmop who?

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

lol!

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

smellmop who=smell my pooo!!!!!

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

do you get the joke?

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

*holds up hand for hi five*

dont leave me hangin joke bro!

Viking Andrew said...

*Hi fives RKt*

Anonymous said...

faggots

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

hey anonymous, that was another rly great post. hey, on an unrelated note y dont u suck shit and die u unoriginal sack of human waste

John said...

I really don't like that word, Anon.

Walter Benjamin and the Mechanical Reproductions (the band) said...

yeah anon like i. jon says that word sux and u sux and you shld be ashamed at having been born

(i ratted you out above)