Twisted ankles occur when you drive to the seedy side of town to buy beer so that nobody you know can calculate just how much alcohol you've imbibed in the last two hours. After you buy two Natural Light tallboys (for $2.50, after tax), what do you do, cowboy? Well naturally, you step off the curb without looking and, ¡ojo!, immeasurable pain. But don't worry; you're not getting any Lorcet out of this bad boy--just some swelling.Rating: 4%
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5 comments:
I saw a Natty Light TV commercial for the first time ever the other day. Is the economy really that bad?
Tell the truth--you twisted your ankle trying to get away from whoever ended up inflicting the Red Ring of Doom.
I'm going to have to go ahead and give you a hard time for drinking and driving when clearly you can't even handle drinking and walking. What would you mother say? For shame!
@I.J.,
A man driving slowly through the shady-ass gas station parking lot saw what happened--I twisted my ankle so hard the bottom of the shamefully-black plastic bag holding the two beers exploded, and the beers flew across the parking lot. The man laughed. I retrieved the beer.
@Laurie,
I oppose drinking and driving. It's a controversial take on the issue, but I stand by it.
Oh Andrew, you possess a special kind of depraved cute that just doesn't quit.
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