Sperms are what we call male reproductive cells. They're shaped like tadpoles so they can whip their way over, around or through any obstacle to make you feel nauseous for at least three months. If you're lucky, sperms come from breaking a futon in your in-laws' basement while you half-watch Clint Eastwood threaten minority youngsters with guns. Sperms can make your tummy grow and grow, and help you retain water for 9 months until you feel the most excruciating pain and then meet the coolest person you feel like you've met already. In terms of accomplishing fertilization, some people's sperms are pretty damn good for not even trying.RATING: 92%--I've only been pregnant twice in 6 years.
(Image from www.adrants.com.)
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14 comments:
I'm disgusting. As I was saying, as the coolest person ever, I'm confused by your second to last sentence.
Hey, remember the time Sung Hyun was telling us about his Korean army friend that no one liked, so they fried a bunch of semen and put it in a sandwich for him? Don't you wish you could be in the South Korean army?
(I guess R3 is kind of like the South Korean army in that you have to take shit from Americans all day long).
Welcome aboard, IR. I can't quite tell what that's ad for. London in love? Gross.
The egg looks like the brain-on-drugs ad from the 80s. This is your egg. This is your egg on sperm.
Um, congratulations?
Thanks, Belabras.
We thought the image was appropriate since on one hand, it alludes to the act of conception and, on the other, hearty breakfasts such as the British eat have been making us both look as if we're pregnant for years.
This post is genius. Great work, Robyn
So...you had sex while watching Gran Torino? Am I the only one who thinks that's fucked up?
Anyway, good post Robyn. Welcome to R3 (finally) and congratulations! You might want to also consider a "vaginas vaginas vaginas" tag for this one even tho it's about sperm.
Nothing says sexy and British like beans and fried eggs.
ah, the return of the V3 tag! it's a good day. welcome, IR!
Thanks for the warm welcome, R3.
IJ, are you your own grandpa? Also, I am in the SK army. I only get pregnant if kimchi is involved.
Glenn, black pudding is pretty hot!
Laurie, re:IUD success rate,who published those stats?
Leave Glenn's penis out of this. Also, R3 doesn't tolerate racism.
You have a good point, that's the stats from the official patient info sheet from ParaGard, but Planned Parenthood's website also says less that 1 in 100 women will get pregnant while using it. So I'm sticking with my theory that your husband has mighty, mighty sperm.
i. jon must be the horniest motherfucker alive
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