Short reviews of pretty much whatever. Finally, you can discover if Frosted Flakes Gold has more social worth than Illmatic or Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare.
I worked pumping gas at a gas station 10 years ago. Taxi drivers and bikers would exchange packages in the bathroom. The employees would play scratch tickets, and the game was to win enough to pay for all the tickets we'd already scratched. By the end of it I had figured out how to fool the computer so that I could ring items in but not log the purchases and then steal enough for a pack of cigarettes every shift. I also fucked my then-girlfriend on my boss' desk. I'm sorry now that I was such a shitty employee, but everyone else there was doing it, and at the time my moral code was much more callow and self-serving than it is today.
holy fuck, that was a p. good story i was just gonna tell yall this time me and my friend huffed gas behind a bp on us 19 and a hobo came by when we pased out and stole our pants
Once, while I was filling up at a gas station in College Station, this haggard-looking couple came up and told me how they were in town for the carnival and needed a few bucks for something to eat. I gave them five bucks. The lady said, "Thank you so much. We're carnival folk, so you know we're good for it."
Which will forever be the single funniest utterance I have ever heard somebody say in complete earnest.
After thinking about it all day I've determined that I do not have any interesting gas pumping stories. This could be a result of never having owned a car.
Nope. I had a motorcycle for three years, but never a car. But the bike got 50/mi to the gallon and nothing interesting ever happened when I was filling it up.
The most interesting thing about me pumping gas is that I can do it at all...also I can't ever get the clip-thing to work so that I don't have to hold the trigger down/hold the pump at an absurdly specific angle.
I really miss not having to drive. Even though today is totally a plastic rain bonnet day, I'm happy to bus it.
I miss full-serve stations. I was always willing to pay extra to have someone else do the gas and also, back in the day, clean off my windshield for me.
Wake me when it's over!
Nice artwork VA!
ReplyDeleteThanks, man. I haven't used Paint in about eight years. I put a lot of effort into it.
ReplyDeleteTell your favorite gas-pumping stories here. I've got one about a pink shirt...
ReplyDeleteI worked pumping gas at a gas station 10 years ago. Taxi drivers and bikers would exchange packages in the bathroom. The employees would play scratch tickets, and the game was to win enough to pay for all the tickets we'd already scratched. By the end of it I had figured out how to fool the computer so that I could ring items in but not log the purchases and then steal enough for a pack of cigarettes every shift. I also fucked my then-girlfriend on my boss' desk. I'm sorry now that I was such a shitty employee, but everyone else there was doing it, and at the time my moral code was much more callow and self-serving than it is today.
ReplyDeleteholy fuck, that was a p. good story i was just gonna tell yall this time me and my friend huffed gas behind a bp on us 19 and a hobo came by when we pased out and stole our pants
ReplyDeletei called a attorney about sueing the gas station but he said we were deliquents and we shld be locked up (dont worry we keyd his car)
ReplyDeletethe previous story was inspired in part by that tits ass music vid glen posted a few days ago
ReplyDeleteOnce, while I was filling up at a gas station in College Station, this haggard-looking couple came up and told me how they were in town for the carnival and needed a few bucks for something to eat. I gave them five bucks. The lady said, "Thank you so much. We're carnival folk, so you know we're good for it."
ReplyDeleteWhich will forever be the single funniest utterance I have ever heard somebody say in complete earnest.
I sold a bottle of mouthwash to an indian with a van full of kids.
ReplyDeletewere they his?
ReplyDeleteor did he steal them into white slavery
ReplyDeleteDunno. Didn't ask.
ReplyDeleteAfter thinking about it all day I've determined that I do not have any interesting gas pumping stories. This could be a result of never having owned a car.
ReplyDeleteNot even in Florida?
ReplyDeleteNope. I had a motorcycle for three years, but never a car. But the bike got 50/mi to the gallon and nothing interesting ever happened when I was filling it up.
ReplyDeletei see a lot of catcalling during gas station fill ups j. wld you say a gas station is a good place to get a piece
ReplyDelete(is j internet jon btw?)
ReplyDeleteWho?
ReplyDeletejust some jerk
ReplyDeleteGood question....
ReplyDeletelets see, j said he/she worked at a gas station 10 yrs ago and i. jon is 52 so that makes sense
ReplyDelete"I also fucked my then-girlfriend on my boss' desk."
ReplyDeleteCan't be me. I'm a virgin.
The most interesting thing about me pumping gas is that I can do it at all...also I can't ever get the clip-thing to work so that I don't have to hold the trigger down/hold the pump at an absurdly specific angle.
ReplyDeleteI really miss not having to drive. Even though today is totally a plastic rain bonnet day, I'm happy to bus it.
@loco: Well that's just adorable.
ReplyDeleteI miss full-serve stations. I was always willing to pay extra to have someone else do the gas and also, back in the day, clean off my windshield for me.
ReplyDeleteHi! I'm old.