Organic bananas are fucking tits. They cost 30¢ more per pound than regular bananas, but they also taste about 28¢ better per pound, so that's fine with me. I always find it hard to go back to regular produce after eating its organic equivalent, because the former usually tastes sort of like what I imagine chewing a fresh tab of trailer park ecstasy hypothetically tastes like.
RATING: 89%
(Image from blog.cleveland.com.)
Organic veggies are the way to go. They taste like food instead of dirt, which is what I thought carrots actually tasted like until I splurged one day on the organic ones.
ReplyDeleteI usually try not to eat vegetables that other people have splurged on, but I guess if you wash them it's OK. Christ only knows what they get up to down in Chile.
ReplyDeleteYou have to eat everything I splurge on. It was in the vows!
ReplyDeletethis comment page make me feel gross
ReplyDeleteI've gotta be honest. That dancing banana kind of annoys me.
ReplyDeleteOnly because it's so large.
Doesn't anyone ever have anything nice to say about the things that I post on this blog?
ReplyDeleteYou know what you can do with that dancing banana, boss?
(Make a twitching peanut butter and banana sandwich with it, of course.)
P.S. I tried to make it smaller, but it'll only dance at full size.
ReplyDeleteThe dancing banana is kind of ginormous. But I do like organic bananas and organic food in general.
ReplyDeleteHey, Brent!
ReplyDeleteSpell "IHOP" and then say "ness".
Eating organic is a joke unless you're buying local and eating in season.
ReplyDeleteWhy? Are organic carrots grown in Manitoba bad for diners in Newfoundland? As for "eating in season," Canada's growing season is fucking 3 months long.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the question of whether to buy organic or not isn't as simple as some pseudo-Greens seem to think, but they don't grow any bananas where I'm from.
You should try our organic icicles, though.
Is the banana dancing? Or is he doing more of a celebratory jig?
ReplyDeleteCan we please stop using the expression "tits." I don't really care about it's sexist connotation, I just think it sounds fucking "stupid."
ReplyDelete@ Laurie
ReplyDeleteOpinion noted, but seriously, no way. 1) It's not sexist, b/c men have tits too; 2) tits are super-awesome, and part of our mammalian heritage; and 3) there's no apostrophe in "its."
@ Andrew
ReplyDeleteIsn't a jig a kind of dance? The only kind of dance a whiskey-addled Scotsman can manage?
Oh, come on people! I-H-O-P-ness
ReplyDeleteThat was the BEST laugh I have had in AGES and not one reaction!?!
Is Canadian/ maritime humour lost on Texans/Floridians?
I guess there is still hope for nBNL!
@John: Go fuck yourself, that was a typo.
ReplyDelete@Robyn: Sorry, totally lost on me.
So, what exactly do these cheaper synthetic bananas taste like, and where can I find them because all the bananas I've ever seen come out of the earth and don't taste at all like tits?
ReplyDeleteJohn from Daejeon
@John from Daejeon
ReplyDeleteThey metaphorically taste like tits. If tits were bananas, they'd taste like organic bananas.
Regarding usage, I'm OK with the term "organic" denoting "grown without chemical pesticides," but I draw the line at "inorganic."
@Robyn
I guess your sense of humour is just too highbrow for this crowd.
@Robyn
ReplyDeleteI guess your sense of humor involves a u.
Smoked any good cigarets lately, dickhead?
ReplyDeleteHey now. Just a little Post-Colonial joshing.
ReplyDeletelol it sound likie i ate your pennis that shit funny as hell
ReplyDelete(one mite say, tits)
ReplyDelete*puffs on tobaco pipe*
*reads finagans wake*
LOL
ReplyDeletenBL, you are killing me.
is loco bein sacrastic
ReplyDelete