I can't imagine what it must be like to be a dancer for a minor league hockey team. Even dancers for pro sports don't get paid - it's all volunteer work, in addition to the chance to "meet" the stars of the team. Well, there are no real stars of the Houston Aeros, because anybody good gets called up to the Minnesota Wild, so basically if you're an Aero Dynamic all you get is to awkwardly dance to a bad mix of nu metal, Better Than Ezra, and 90s dance music while keeping a smile on your face, in some hope that you can relive the glory of your high school cheerleading days or a Hollywood producer somehow in the audience will see you and you'll make it big. Sorry, ya dumb broads, this is as good as it's going to get. Also, I guess it's your job whenever a section wins free pizza coupons for cheering the loudest to ignore the Arab dude on the end and not give him his fucking coupon even when he's looking right at you.RATING: 32%
You owe me a pizza, Glenn.
ReplyDelete"Sorry, ya dumb broads, this is as good as it's going to get."
ReplyDeleteThat's the coolest thing I've ever heard you say.
Glenn, on behalf of the Houston Aero Dynamics team I would like to apologize for looking straight into your beautiful eyes and not giving you a coupon. My only excuse is that your tongue wasn't hanging out like the other dudes, so I wasn't sure that you actually wanted a coupon. So, next time, please wag your tongue OK.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand. Where exactly are they located in relation to the ice/team? Like, where do they stand/dance?
ReplyDelete@Chris - Sorry I stole the review from you. I couldn't hold my rage in any longer.
ReplyDelete@Laurie - They dance in the stands, although they also go out and help clean up pucks after the 2nd intermission "Chuck-a-Puck" event with Buc-ee, The Truck Stop Beaver and Chilly Dog, the Houston Aeros' mascot.
I am adding going to one of these games to the list of things I want to do next time I'm in Houston.
ReplyDeleteYou should the dance team for the Brevard Blue Ducks (Melbourne, FL minor league basketball team). They're called the Blue Chicks (clever!) and I'm pretty sure they're all pregnant. Go team!
ReplyDeleteWait... Buc-ee The Truck Stop Beaver? Booooooo.
ReplyDeleteGlenn:
ReplyDeleteCHILLY DOG! CHILLY DOGGGGG!
(Said in my best drunk guy bellow.)
That is all.
lot of new faces around these parts
ReplyDeleteHey you remember how in high school the cheerleaders were always kind of cute, but the dance team always looked like a pack of skanks? Good to see that holds true after h.s., too.
ReplyDeleteLotta cankles.
ReplyDeleteI can't decide whether to comment on the girls' unflattering sneakers/outfits, weird flesh colored footless tights, or how often R3 forces me to go to urban dictionary.
ReplyDeleteYeah, we're from the streets, yo. We keep it real when we talk on R3, know what I'm sayin'? Word, son.
ReplyDelete@Laurie - Sarah (my fiancee and part-time commenter) was in charge of her h.s. dance team. Said broad generalization does not apply.
ReplyDelete@Bryan: Okay, that's fair (sorry Sarah!). But I can say in all certainty that MY h.s. dance team looked like a pack of skanks.
ReplyDeleteNo, it's true. We're pretty skanky.
ReplyDeleteYou don't have to be on the h.s. dance team to look like a skank you know. Hell I didn't even go to high school. So there, bitch!
ReplyDelete2 cheers for skanks: hip hip hoor-ay, hip hip hoor-ay.
ReplyDelete"Remember how in high school the cheerleaders..."
ReplyDeleteNope! I <3 NYC High School
I can't decide whether or not this should have a V3 tag.
ReplyDeleteV14 P1, maybe? Check out the one on the far right.
ReplyDelete